For a large number of Spanish families, the month of September presents a big challenge: returning to routine. And the youngest members of the household are not exempt from this adjustment. The start of the school year requires returning to the orderly life of schedules, meals, and sleep. Sometimes parents worry about whether it will be possible for the children to adapt smoothly.

The reality is yes, although not all children do so in the same way, some struggle more than others but with a little help and some strategies, they will manage to return to their school life without difficulty. Taking advantage of the fact that during the first week of September children do not have school, these days can be used to gradually introduce them into the routine. We can start with meal and dinner schedules, also with bath time and, if both parents feel up to it, propose an activity that allows them to be calm and focused for a few minutes.

The psychologists from the Madrid office Grow with Emotion have wanted to offer some ideas for this, sometimes dreaded, back to school.

It depends on the ages

With each age, back to school is faced differently. “Parents need to be aware of the developmental stage their children are in and what they might be demanding,” explains psychologist Pilar Arroyo. Are they still struggling with separation? Are they shy and anxious about seeing their classmates again? “If so — she explains — it is important to listen to them and allow them to have an adjustment period and feel their parents are close by supporting them as needed.”

According to the psychologists, “with those children who are not in their first year of school, it is beneficial to talk about what awaits them… a new school year begins, which does not imply all newness and vertigo, perhaps yes in terms of material, teachers, and classroom, but the school is already known and so are some of the children. Also, if your child is struggling to start again and feels somewhat withdrawn about going back to school, you could help them by telling them all the good things that happen at school (and that they do not remember right now), reminiscing a fun day from the past year and projecting future positive moments they will experience.”

Recommendations

From 12 months to 3 years

—Gradual adaptation to get to know the new space always with a reference person who provides the security they need at that moment.

—Gradually withdraw so that the teacher, progressively, becomes the reference figure who will convey the security needed to feel comfortable and well.

—It is positive to always say goodbye, even if it will be difficult for a time, it is essential for them to understand that we are leaving but will return for them later, their attachment figure leaves and comes back. If we disappear without notice, we can cause them much anxiety, and the child might try in every way not to separate from us.

From 3 to 6 years:

—On the days before school starts, try to engage in more calm activities.

—Try to return from holidays a few days before school begins, this way the children get used to their home and belongings, which are more associated with routines.

From 6 years old onwards:

—A couple of days before, start talking about going back to school, prepare with your child the supplies they will need (backpack, pencils, books…). All this usually excites them, especially if they can choose it and it features their favorite character.

—Empathize with their emotions, listen to their concerns and accept their complaints, without denying but proposing a positive perspective. For example: it’s true that waking up early is lazy, but you’ll see how it won’t be as hard as you think later.

Like all changes, sometimes adaptation is tough, but it is important to convey to children that it is positive to close chapters and that vacations are wonderful because they represent a reward for a job well done, a job that comes again. Also, children, even though it may seem impossible, also get tired of too much free time, and they will appreciate the orderly life that the end of vacations brings.